I spew all these words at you, releasing them from bonking around up in my noggin causing a ruckus.
You know
It was
Quite
Obvious
To me
You and
Her have
Your own
Past.
—-
I read it
Off both
Your faces
Instantly.
I felt the
Tension,
Seeing you
Look at her
the Same
Way You
Look At me.
—-
I felt her
Presence,
Nurturing
Pinpricks,
A spine of
Solid Metal
Betrayal.
—-
Once I’d
Learned
They’d
Never met
It only
Solidified
All my
Hunches.
—-
The three
Of us,
Standing
There in
That hall,
Coalesced
By the
Burning
Nova of
Your gaze.
—-
Did you get
What you
Wanted from
Each of us?
Sacrifices
My heart
At the
Altar of
My tongue.
—-
It damns off
The absolute
Bloodbaths
Of adoration
Anxiously
Circulating
Through
My Veins.
—-
I[t] know[s]
Better.
My systems
Need
Something
To keep
Us Running.
—-
I[t] know[s]
We have
Poured
Ourselves
Entirely OUT
For men
Before;
& Ended up
Nearly dead.
Just Outside
This Window
Of my head.
Thanks
For your
Continued
Patience,
My Cerebral
Peeping Tom.
—-
We both
Know
This is my
[-Paper-NO]
Digital Doll
Dressing
Room.
—-
You may be
Disappointed
To observe
The space
Doesn’t come
Equip with
A Gloryhole
For you to
Anonymously
Insert Yourself
Into My Hind—
—————Sight.
—-
Do you Like
Watching
Me slip all
The silky
Material
Over my
Shoulders,
Zip up my
In-seems,
& Smooth
Out these
Awkwardly
Laid Wrinkles
Of myself?
—-
Don’t
come
In……
[I’m Too
Shy 🙈 ☺️].
I’ll come
Out for the
Big Reveal
When I’m
Good
& Ready.
You don’t
Have to
__________
That You
Too align
All your
Corners.
I know,
Dah-ling.
—-
This is
—Ours.
As this
Space
Now is.
—-
But,
What Kind
Of “space”
—Exactly—
—did you
Refer to Our
Creation, hm?
P-lease,
E-lab-or-ate.
—-
What does
That space
Up there
Look like..?
[Two-steps-
——A-head
—-of Me…?]
—-
Moving
Forward,
You said
You didn’t
[wouldn’t?]
[Want to?]
Go Back
to Ours.
There
Can
Only be
So Many
Rulers.
—-
So,
Tell Me
….Now,
What
is Your
Day-core?
—-
Only Tell
The Truth:
Are you
Having a
—-Better
——Time
There…?
I know What
Not Saying
Something
Looks like,
Sweetheart.
—-
When all you
Have is Time,
Recollection
Becomes it’s
Own medium.
—-
Rewatching
The Us has
Crystallized,
There are So
Many Words
You have not
Granted me
The privilege
To see and
Hear of you.
—-
Please know,
Despite my
Cold streak,
Your eventual
Disclosures
Are still safe
Here with me.
—-
There is no
Way for me
To show that
-If you won’t
Let me try.
Late last night, where I read some of my COVID poetry.
Each piece is framed in the form of calling someone.
The energies
In my body
Communicate
Unspeakable
Intentions
In Moments
When My mouth
Isn’t Quite ready.
—-
When I speak
Deep truths,
My throat burns
Red with Release.
—-
In moments
I speak from
My heart,
The surface of
My chest
Radiates brightly;
In brazen
Disregard of the
Shame placed
Upon my feelings
That pass therein.
—-
Don’t be fooled
When my face
And mouth seal.
My body takes
Me upon myself
To Compensate.
—-
The whole of me
Does not hesitate
To spill entirely
Out for you.
What if
I told you
I am a
Simple
Pond
Under
Late-stage
Capitalism?
—-
At first
Glance, I
Look so
Drinkable.
[And drink
You did]
But, little
Did you
Know,
I have
Long been
Poisoned.
—-
At the
Time,
I did only
What my
Contents
Were
Capable of,
What my
Molecules
Were
Mixed with.
—-
I could
Offer
Nothing
More to
You, than
Ecological
Collapse.
—-
Which
Is to say:
That harm
I did to your
Insides was
Nothing
Personal.
—-
For what
It’s worth,
I’ve since
Undergone
Extensive &
Fluid self-
Processing.
—-
Perhaps,
One day
I will even
Be safely
Drinkable
In a way
You always
Deserved to
Be quenched.
I inhale
And
exhale
“I miss
you”s.
—-
Under each
Closed lid
Hide cursive
Chalk lines of
“I miss you”;
Like doing
Time inside
These eyes
Not cast
Upon you
Is it’s own
Punishment.
———————
“As
You
Wish.”
—-
“You never
Fall asleep
In your
Earrings.
Here,
Hand
them
To me.”
—-
“I told
Him to
Leave
You
Alone
If he
Knew
He
Wouldn’t
Love you
Better
Than I
Could.”
—-
“I went
To your
Apartment
And
Knocked
On your
Door
Because
I didn’t
Believe
You
were
Really
Gone.”
—-
“Only
because
I’ll lend
up not
getting
home
until 3.”
