Maybe I’m Not Sick Anymore

“Do you have
A lighter?”

“no, I don’t
smoke.”

“no kidding?
you look like
you would.”

maybe,
I’ll take up
smoking.

“she’s so
‘hates herself’
beautiful…

i love
that
about her,”

they’d say.

I spit
Wherever
I want

Just like
The boys,

“My DNA
Deserves
to be
Everywhere.”

Chamomile tea
And body spritzer

A queen bee
Flys past me
To calm down.

i want my stolen copy of MW2 back

Chandelier,
Ride the bus.

Two wine bottles
empty stomach.

Kegan said
“let me guide”

It’s not rape
if
friends decide.

Looking back

cerebral patches
snuff photographs,

scattered over

blacked

out

crash.

Kegan
left
trauma
in your skin

while
his Goons
made
a meal.

they left
pans
in your
sink

but
bigger mess
in your
head

Kicker:
Now
he’s
dating
your
old best
friend.

tightly woven

he’s got
these women
he weaves
in and out
like
shift work.

never
touching,
always
brushing forces
Uncommunicably;

filling
the gaps
his
miserable
lonliness
awake
he can’t
bare
to face.

son of god,
trapped
on that
fabricated
temple
of entertainment,

never wanting
to be
bothered
on
your time.

says
it’s easier
to
fall asleep
with a
body
nearby,

be it
special
or
unimpressive.

spits out
promises
never
fulfilled

More than
A distributor
does product.

doesn’t ever
fold up
pages
or
face
a mess,

except
the bottles

someone
else

must’ve left
strewn

on
every
surface.

he’s
in control
afterall,

natural born
cult leader,
with pride.

no need for
the
big
picture

with his
knackful
perception,

despite a
blindness

to his own
presentation.

“subconscious
leaking
out
their nose,”

somebody get this man a medal!

full of
compazine
and lexapro

would you
please?

keep talking
with a
tactfully forged
confidence
and you’re
always right,

 
otherwise
anyone else
could get a
second
opinion.

i don’t know, man

i am
a big man
and i say,

“you can’t,”

“i cared
about you,”

and,

no one
else
will.”

“i am a
messy
man”

and
“i’d like to
fix you.”

“i’d like you
to sit
with me,”

and
id like you
to,

“pretend
for me.”

i am a
needy
man;

I will
use you.

i will
convince
you,

and
i will
abuse
you.

ventriloquism
emotion,

watch me
feed on
the empathy.

i am
a snake
of a man,

i’ll
exhaust you.

release
my skin
of you;

unhinging
this jaw
for
new prey.

shell of
a man,

i preoccupy.

hollow man
plastered over,

screaming treason
at those closest.

“i am an
angry man,”

i will
destroy
You;

shattering
self-meaning.

“i am a
scared man.”

i
will
need you.

“you
will not
be
there,

and
i cannot
blame you.”